At the Cocktails and Couture Party the condescending Cuntess wasted no time downsizing Alex for last week’s Bethenny dispatch. Both LuAnn and Bobby chastised Alex for getting in the middle of Jill and Bethenny’s biznass despite simultaneously failing to take their own advice by hypocritically weaseling into her dispute with Jill.
Kelly thought someone was going to pay extra because those dresses graced her snatch. She thinks she’s like Liz Hurley or something. Nobody gives a fuck Kelly. Though her dress choice for the party was an improvement over most of her other wardrobe selections this season.
Jill admitted to suffering remorse over the demise of her relationship with Bethenny. She claimed she wasn’t “ready to make up” at Ramona’s because she felt ambushed. Unfortunately, she lost her opportunity. Bethenny’s pride prevents her from trolling for apologies, and at this point Jill’s regret is too little too late. Tiger and Elin have a greater chance at reconciliation.
Alex tried to talk to Jill, but Jill doesn’t give a fuck about Alex. To Jill, Alex is just a pawn in her power struggle with Bethenny. Jill will never perceive Alex as her social equal and therefore has very little invested in salvaging their fake friendship. However, Alex isn’t the same woman she was first season; her semi-fame has given her more confidence.
Bethenny and Ramona seem to have gotten over the Brooklyn Bridge blowout, and Bethenny confided in Ramona concerning her visit to L.A. to see her father on his deathbed. The cynic in me thinks that the show may have strongly encouraged this call; Bethenny is so isolated from the other housewives this season it feels like she’s already shooting her spin off (premiering June 10th). It is apparent that Bethenny is bursting from the seams of this show and it’s becoming increasingly difficult to keep her in the fold.
A sycophantic wedding dress designer showed up with some gowns for Ramona’s vow renewal. Avery called bullshit on the whole unabashed grab for camera time pointing out the absurdity of the entire affair. Avery is actually the only person in Ramona’s life that can get her to momentarily pause and reconsider her juggernaut course.
LuAnn took Jill, Sonja, and Kelly to some uptown yoga studio where they sat around in lotus chairs and swapped depression stories. If I were any of these vapid, useless, twats I’d be fucking depressed too.
Jennifer Gilbert is the shit, best of the group so far. Ramona rolled in with Bethenny’s dead dad news and Jill lost her shit — not because she cared about Bethenny, but because there’s nothing Jill hates more than being out of the loop.
Ramona gave it as good as Jill and the two screamed at each other in the echoing loft while Jennifer’s kids tried to sleep behind closed doors.
Jill and Kelly took refuge in Jen’s pantry while Sonja strolled in ten minutes late and light years behind. Sonja doesn’t know what the fuck is going on.
Alex prepared her monologue on the way over from Brooklyn and wasted no time accusing Jill of gossiping about Bethenny’s loss. Fingers pointing, nose to nose, Alex and Jill finally had it out.
High heels hurting, Jill plopped down on one side of Kelly and Alex on the other. Kelly’s expression is fucking priceless.
Alex got in a few cogent barbs accusing Jill of pretending to be nice, never listening, criticizing her kids, house, and husband, and mean-girling. Alex leveled Jill who didn’t mount much of a defense. I only wish Alex would have stood her ground and stuck around the party vibing Jill all night. Remember folks, only the defeated flee the scene.