Category Archives: BEAUTY

earring hole blackheads

LOBE BLACKHEADSIf you have pierced ears with no earrings in the holes go to a mirror right now.  Put your thumb on the under side and stretch the lobe so the pierced hole turns inside out.  Did a blackhead plug pop out?  Are you horrified?  I know.  Now turn your lobe the other way and get the back side blackhead plug.  Then go to the other ear and take care of business.  You’re welcome you filthy bitch.  EARBLACKHEAD

minoxidil

NAOMI CAMPBELL RECEDINGI’m trying a radical approach to see if it will work – minoxidil.  I don’t suffer from female pattern baldness, but my hair isn’t as full as it used to be.  Based on preliminary research, I suspect that minoxidil will trigger growth and lengthen the growth phase.  Against label advice, I am using the full 5% strength intended for men.  So far I haven’t noticed beard growth or anything, but I’ve only been using it three days.  Gotta use it every single day x 2 to make the magic happen, and apparently it takes time (90 days) to see results.  I bought the foam from Costco.  Barring any intolerable side-effects, I plan to use the full contents of the package and then reassess.  This experiment is a long-term commitment.  The product must make contact with the scalp to work effectively.  Minoxidil is a vasodilator, so it kinda fucks you up for a few minutes, but the feeling quickly passes.  KIRKLAND MINOXIDIL FOAM

A LA MAISON

A LA MAISON HONEYSUCKLEWith the fervor over sulfates, parabens, and other potential hazards in our products, the hunt for a good body wash can be downright frustrating.  Right now, I’m in love with A LA MAISON.  I know it looks like something you’d find in your Mom’s guest bath.  Don’t let that discourage you.  This super luxurious vegetable based soap has everything you want: suds, light fragrance, and moisture; and nothing you don’t: harsh detergents, and animal/toxic ingredients.  It’s also reasonably priced.A LA MAISON ROSEMARY MINT

Living Proof

JEN AND CHRIS LIVING PROOFDammit.  I already love Living Proof Prime Style Extender, and now I’m hooked on Living Proof Full shampoo and conditioner.  Do you think I want to love anything associated with Jennifer fucking Aniston?  I assure you I do not, but I cannot deny the otherworldly effects of these products.  I prefer wash and wear hair for my daily situation.  My hair goes up into a messy spinpin bun and down again several times a day.  Living Proof improves the texture, volume, and style of my air-dried hair.  Living Proof Full shampoo + conditioner + style extender + air dry = hair looks almost as good as if I finished with heat.  If I actually take the time to blow my hair out with Living Proof the results are major; add hot rollers = bombshell major.  I started this paragraph with the word dammit because Living Proof is pricey, and now I’m addicted.  I console myself knowing with Living Proof I can go a day between washings and still maintain bouncy bedhead.  LP makes my haircut look more expensive.  If Living Proof had nuts, I’d be swinging from them.  LIVING PROOF FULL

facial cleansing oils

OILS GLASSAny bitch who has read a beauty mag in the last 24 months has heard of facial cleansing oils.  Facial cleansing oils have been around for eons, but lately they’ve experienced a renaissance; first within the prestige market and then trickling down to the discount demographic.  Proponents insist oils remove impurities without disrupting the lipid barrier, thereby cleansing without creating unnecessary vulnerability to the skin.  Since I struggle with the holy trifecta of breakouts, dryness, and sensitivity, I hoped oils could help calm the epidermal storm. CLEANSING OILSIn the last few months, I’ve worked a rotation of three different cleansing oils.  To clean the skin, rub facial cleansing oil into dry skin.  Then you could take it a number of different routes: emulsification and warm water rinse, washcloth, grains, etc.  Personally, I use a Clarisonic.  No suds.  No foam.  The makeup slides off in the slick, including difficult mascara.  Expect super soft, clean, nourished skin as a result.KISMET CLEANSING OIL1) First, DHC Deep Cleansing Oil, a cult favorite comprised of the following: olea europaea (olive) fruit oil, caprylic/capric triglyceride, sorbeth-30 tetraoleate, pentylene glycol, phenoxyethanol, tocopherol, stearyl glycyrrhetinate, rosmarinus officinalis (rosemary) leaf oil.  Although, the principal ingredient is olive oil, the addition of rosemary adds an interesting dimension.  I enjoy DHC Deep Cleansing Oil because it’s luxurious and reasonably priced.  I bestow a letter grade of A-.DHC DEEP CLEANSING OIL2 ) Second, consider organic extra virgin coconut oil.  Like many of you, I buy the big tub at Costco and use it all over.  Among the three mentioned here, the most economical and simple choice is the organic extra virgin coconut oil.  With just one pure ingredient, there’s only a marginal likelihood of allergy or reaction.  For its simplicity and ready availability I give it an ACOSTCO COCONUT OIL

3) Third, let me present Josie Maran Argan Cleansing Oil which is a mix of argania spinosa kernal (argan) oil, polysorbate-20, carthamus tinctorius (safflower) seed oil, vitis vinifera (grape) seed oil, olea europaea (olive) fruit oil, prunus amygdalus dulcis oil, citrus grandis (grapefruit) peel oil, tocopherol.  Sweeter, I like the consistency and experience of Josie Maran Argan Cleansing Oil, but when I accidentally got some in my mouth it tasted yucky.  It’s also the most expensive of the three and for these reasons I grade it a respectable B.    JOSIE MARAN CLEANSING OIL

 

Skills for Life: Accountability

MISS WILCOXLately, accountability is my trigger.  I work really hard at keeping my word.  Sometimes I fail (eehhm late post), but when I act irresponsibly I feel it with a heavy heart.  Am I the only one?  Last month, I tried to plan a trip with a friend and she just wouldn’t get back to me.  I asked two different people to help with home repairs, both committed to a specific day, both bailed.  A friend still owes me money from this fall.  When I plan a dinner now, I just assume someone will back out with a bullshit excuse at the last minute – because someone always does. ACCOUNTABILITY DOODLE I was going deep with my friend the other night on the issue of accountability.  I was bitching about feeling let down.  She basically informed me my expectation that people follow through is unrealistic.  I should just accept that most people are flaky, and if I did I would feel less dismay.  No doubt there’s some wisdom there, but aren’t basement level expectations doing everyone a disservice?  I expect more out of myself, and I expect more out of you.  The universe is a tricky mistress.  As soon as I started sending out an energetic desire for accountability, who comes along to offer help?  An unusually sexy and handsome accountant.  For crying out loud.  ACCOUNTANT

Sparkle Tooth

TOOTH CRYSTALTo paraphrase Cher Horowitz, I don’t mean to be a traitor to my generation or anything, but I just don’t get the sparkle tooth trend.  A few of my friends have appeared with gems on their incisors and it totally freaks me out.  I obsessively stare at the sparkly spot.  It’s distracting in the worst possible way.TOOTH GEM INCISORWho wants to draw attention to a random tooth?  From an aesthetic perspective I find the practice distastefully confounding.  From a hygienic standpoint, it’s repulsive.  I fully support your right to self-expression, but can we not with the tooth gems please?   MAKE MONEY TOOTH

Plackers

PLACKERS TWIN LINEI admit my commitment to flossing is sporadic, but I have gotten a lot more consistent in the last few months upon my discovery of Plackers Twin-Line Dental Flossers.  Most individual flossers shred between the first two molars.  Plackers are remarkably durable and resistant to breakage.  The twin line does a particularly thorough job of cleaning between teeth.  The flossers also have this hinging poker to access hard to reach places around the gums.  PLACKERS MICRO MINT

At Home Jessner

DERMALURE JESSNER LGA few weeks ago, I discovered you can buy full strength professional Jessner peels online without a license.  Imagine my horror/surprise/delight when an ounce costs less than $25.  How can you not be delighted at that price?  The horror arose at the thought I’d been paying 4x that for one peel application at the spa.  I’m surprised that regulators would allow laypeople to self-administer such a product.  SKIN OBSESSION JESSNER KITI admit I was scared and worked up a number of dreadful self-maiming scenarios.  After sitting on the product for over a week, I decided to administer my own peel.  I do things my own way.  I’ll tell you how I did it, and you can customize your routine accordingly.  MAJOR PEELI prepare a clean face with a thin layer of coconut oil.  A barrier cream helps prevent over-peeling in sensitive areas – for me around the eyes and mouth.  PEEL FACENext I prepare a neutralizing solution.  Fill a large bowl with boiling water.  Add baking soda until it stops fizzing.  Very scientific, I know.  LET COOL.  Confirm the neutralizing solution is room temperature before proceeding.  Procure a clean washcloth.  Put it in the neutralizing solution.  (Some kits come with a neutralizing solution.)BAKING SODANow I have an exit strategy in place should the hellfire burn of the acid prove too intense for my fragile constitution.FAINTING LADYFor application I prefer Swisspers hypoallergenic cotton rounds. SWISSPERSI strongly recommend the use of gloves and safety eyewear.  EYE SAFETYApply peel to cotton pad.  I begin on the “tougher” areas like the forehead, cheeks, and jawline.  For me, these areas take longer exposure to secure a decent peel.  Then I fill in more sensitive areas like the nose and areas of the face that express movement.  I tend to peel deeper and faster in these areas. JESSNER PEEL CHEEKS CHINI complete one pass over the whole face and a quick second pass over more troublesome areas.  Because it burns like the dickens, I don’t leave it on very long (3 minutes max) and I don’t achieve full frosting, but I am not a cake so I’m at peace with it.  I use the excess product with a wipe to the back of my hands and bottoms of my feet. FROSTINGTo halt the process, gently submerge face in the bowl of neutralizer and then gently apply the washcloth.  The burning immediately subsides.BOWL OF WATERThe treatment resulted in a light all-over peel.  It was pretty even, but there was definitely deeper peeling at the temples and less peeling at the forehead.  I will keep this in mind for next time. PEEL DAY FOURI didn’t go big and I’m glad I didn’t.  As you know, the recovery time associated with a Jessner can be brutal.  I appreciate controlling the intensity and timing to minimize the recovery-related inconvenience.PEEL BEFORE AFTERTHIS PEEL IS NOT FOR AMATEURS.   Seriously though, I don’t know where you get more dramatic results for under $30 bucks.  Explore cautiously.BIG JESSNER PEEL