Category Archives: DIET

nom, nom, nom…

BOULDER CANYON SP FRIESTell you what I can’t stop munching: Boulder Canyon Natural Foods Sweet Potato Fries.  Many of you will understandably cringe at the use of the term “mouth feel,” but it’s true.  The mouth feel of the sweet potato fry is mega addictive.  Buy two bags because you will tear through the first one almost immediately.  In case you’re worried that they are gross, limp, or greasy – don’t – they are airy, crisp, salty, and light.  Softly crunchy.  Very enjoyable.BOULDER CANYON SWEET POTATO FRIES

Dirty Dinner with Dez

DEZI love my friend Dez.  She’s one of the most generous, kind, and attentive friends in my circle.  I was utterly delighted when she asked me to dinner last night at a nearby bar.  This place isn’t fancy, but I wouldn’t call it a “dive” per se.  Local bar.  Bar food.  Hipsters, but still sports on screens.  You get it.  THE WHORNETSo Dez orders her buffalo burger, and I order my veggie burger.  The dry house-made black bean burger is not spectacular, but palatable.  I didn’t specifically ask, but Dez seemed content enough with her buffalo meat.  Neither of us finished our food, but we didn’t send it back either.  BURGERAs we are winding up our meal, a shocked and curious look came over Dez’s face.  My back was to a long row of windows facing the street, so I figured one of her Plenty-of-Fishermen passed by or something.

THE WHORNET EMPTY“WHAT?!”  I asked.  ROACH

“There’s a roach on the wall.”  She replied calmly.  Dez is a fantastic nurse, so she knows how to maintain composure when lesser women might squeal with girlish horror.  I turned and at shoulder height, in no particular rush, was an inch long roach.  I immediately switched seats away from our little friend and stared incredulously at its unmitigated gall.  This isn’t the roach prom, why are you out here parading around little guy?ROACH PROMWe had already turned our payment over to the waitress.  She brought around our charge slips.  I pulled her in closer, looked her in the eyes, and said “there’s a roach on the wall.”  She looked up and said, “Oh, I’ll tell the manager.”  WAITRESSAnd that was it.  No reaction.  No capturing and killing of the roach.  No apologetic manager.  No apologetic waitress.  No begging to keep this little incident off Yelp.  Concerning non-reaction, no?CLOSED

coco quench

TORTOISE LEGI reside in a tortuously arid region and my skin suffers from intense dryness, especially in the winter.  Despite the itchy discomfort of parched dermis, I at times find applying lotion post-shower tedious.  After I’m dried off, that extra delay waiting for moisturizer to absorb before getting dressed sometimes just feels like too much.  I’m so lazy, right?  SPECTRUM COCONUT OILI’ve come up with a solution: coconut oil cooking spray.  Random, I know.  Hear me out.  Spray delivery is fun, quick, thorough, and allows you to easily reach difficult areas like the space between your shoulder blades.  Spectrum Naturals Coconut Oil Spray is food grade, so you don’t have to worry about parabens or other sketchy cosmetic additives seeping into your body.  The fragrance is light, natural, and fleeting.  The sheer layer of oil absorbs quickly and leaves skin super soft.  I personally enjoy coconut, but any high-quality, nourishing oil will do. AVOCADO OIL SPRAY

 

 

Giving Granola

Think occasionally of the suffering of which you spare yourself the sight.

 - Albert SchweitzerHOMELESS HELP

For many years, I have struggled with how to respond to people standing on medians and corners waiving signs for money.  My knee-jerk response is at first sympathy, followed up immediately with a wallop of shame for my own abundance.  To talk myself out of doing something generous and to assauge my own guilt, I told myself that these desperate people were scammers or presumed how they might use any spare change I might give.  These excuses have never really sat quite right when deep down I knew I was just selfishly ignoring the obvious suffering of others.  BAD HEART GOD BLESSI consulted with my good friend Lisa, who has virtually single-handedly reformed syringe access legislation in Colorado (to support Lisa’s good work please visit and donate to the www.harmreductionactioncenter.org).  Lisa spends a significant amount of time involved with outreach, much of which involves contact with the homeless.  She’ll tell you stories that will crack your heart in two.  Seeing as I can’t afford to place cash to every outreached hand, I asked Lisa if she thought it would be appropriate to share food – granola bars – or something similarly individually pre-packaged – with those in need.  She concurred that from her experience with the community, this gesture would be welcomed and not ridiculed.    NEED HELPWouldn’t you know that just a day later, a rep for Kind Snacks stopped by my work and dropped off a few boxes of granola bars.  So technically, I was supposed to share the swag with my co-workers, but those bitches eat enough fucking granola, so I stashed the snacks in my car with the intention of distributing them to those lonely median-dwellers.  KIND BARSI’ve given out a few bars to different folks and the snacks are met with delight.  Yesterday, I gave a bar to a girl standing in the cold by an exit off-ramp.  The next day, at the same exit, in the same bitter cold, was the same girl.  I held another bar out the window.  She walked up to the car and took it from my hand.  HOMELESS HELP APPRECIATED

She lit up, “Thank you!  Did you give me one of these yesterday?”  

“Yes” I smiled back.

She looked at the bar in her hand, “These are good!  I was so hungry yesterday and I’m so hungry now.  Thank you so much.”

“I’m so glad you like them.” I choked back through a broken heart.

With this small exchange came total confirmation, and then the light turned green.  BIEBER GIVES

 

icy

FROSTY GLASSESWhen I remodeled my kitchen, I opted out of a freezer with a built-in ice maker.  In my experience, the ice that comes out of built-in ice makers usually tastes like whatever is in the freezer.  Gross.  Personally, I’m not a daily ice consumer, but if I am going to invest in an ice maker it’s gotta be the good ice.  Nugget Ice.NUGGET ICE While I’m saving up for my very own nugget ice maker, I’ve come up with a temporary solution for my icelessness.  I fill high-ball and pint glasses one eighth of an inch (+/-) full of filtered water and then freeze.  The glass gets nice and frosty and the water conveniently freezes into a cube in the bottom of the glass.  When guests come by, you have a frosty glass + ice already to go.  The presentation is enjoyable and unexpected.  This creative chilling method beats the hell out of messy, space-sucking ice trays which produce plastic-tasting cubes.     MAC ON ICE

 

TG TRUTH

STICK A FORK IN ITSo now that it is over, can we admit a few truths about Thanksgiving?  I hear a lot of people say that Thanksgiving is their favorite holiday.  When you peel away all the layers of butter and get to the core intention of gratitude, I understand the appeal of the holiday.  However in my practical experience, Thanksgiving celebrations rarely reflect that core intention.THANKSGIVING MYTHOne of the most annoying aspects of Thanksgiving is the collective white-washing we find so comforting with regard to the historical facts surrounding early settlers’ contact with native people.  Why are we still spewing this happy pilgrim / helpful native bullshit?  Not to get all preachy, but how ’bout we use Thanksgiving to highlight other examples of neo-colonialist exploitation happening right now?  Or better yet, take a trip to a Reservation and show the kiddies how great it worked out for those helpful “Indians.”  Even though this isn’t a new criticism, there’s still no new narrative. PILGRIM BULLSHITThanksgiving has become more a celebration of gluttony than gratitude.  Now I’m going in on the food  – which if you actually think about it is really disgusting.  The traditional Thanksgiving spread is a depressing two note tune.  SWEET or SAVORY.  There is usually nothing raw, scant spice, and little in the way of contrast.  Veggies drown in heavy sauces or casseroles.  Fruits slug through sugary syrups.  Almost everything else is brown or white.  Every year experts hotly debate the best way to prepare a moist turkey.  Brine?!  Parchment?!  Deep fry?!  Newsflash.  Any which way you prepare the turkey it will be dry and gross.  That’s because turkey is innately dry and gross.  No amount of submerging, poking, or braising the bird will change this eternal truth.  I watch people saw away at dry turkey every year.  No one ever compliments the turkey.  They compliment everything but the turkey.TURKEY REMNANTS

The art of conversation is apparently lost.  People truly don’t know how to communicate with one another anymore.  A series of rapid-fire questions isn’t a conversation; it’s an interrogation.  Don’t force me talk about being a vegetarian when everyone at the table is eating meat.  Don’t ask about work.  This isn’t a job interview.  I hate small talk.  There is an art to finding interesting and inclusive topics of conversation.  Engaging the group requires social tactical skill.  Cultivate it.  Myself included.  DEAD CONVERSATION

 

i’m grateful…

PEANUTS THANKSGIVING…to spend the day with kind, welcoming, and gracious people.yoga sunset…even though I’m working today; it’s a blessing because I love my job. VEG…for access to abundant fresh foods to prepare and share.VEG TG…most of all for you!  Happy Thanksgiving! DCPOOH AND PIGLET

 

Dandies Vegan Marshmallows

DANDIESI admit I long for the classic marshmallow-topped sweet potatoes every year at Thanksgiving, but I never get to enjoy them because of the non-vegetarian friendly gelatin in the marshmallows.  This year will be different because of Dandies vegan marshmallows.  In texture, taste, and quality they equal or exceed regular non-vegetarian marshmallows without relying on gelatin or non-vegan sugar.  Substitute Dandies for this year’s topping so EVERYONE can enjoy the sweet potatoes.  Yum!  SWEET POTATOES AND MARSHMALLOWS

4 for Friday

JUSTIN PB CUPSI’m munching Justin’s Organic Peanut Butter Cups.COLLARD GREENSI’m bouncing to Collard Greens. ZOILA CHAVEZ

I’m binge watching old Bravo programming (Flipping Out season 2 = fenomenal) on the Esquire Network.

BACON BOWLI’m horrified by the Perfect Bacon Bowl?!BACON AND MAC