Category Archives: HOME

slackadaisical

OVERSCHEDULED

Apologies.  It’s been an every-other-day type of week.  I won’t makes excuses; we’re all over-scheduled.  Let’s catch up, shall we?

PALTROW AND MARTIN

A word on Paltrow and Martin, I’m surprised she stayed as long as she did.  Sure, she’s insufferable, but he’s fermented into cheddar along with his crappy soft-rock band.  He’s no longer a prestige partner, and Gwyneth only does prestige, hunny.  Speculation continues to swirl over who fucked whom during the rumored open marriage.  Do you think Jay-Z belongs in that rumor mill, ya’ll?

JAYZ AND PALTROW

Regarding the plane, I’m just going to say it though it may be irresponsible.  I think the missing plane was shot down by the military – probably accidentally.  Which country’s military, I don’t know, but they are drawing attention to the end of the earth for a reason.  It’s a classic diversion and cover-up scenario.  The whole situation is super suspicious.  My heart aches for the families in the emotional limbo of unknowing.

UNKNOWING

I finished my taxes myself.  Like middle school, I’m just glad it’s over.

TAX COLLECTORS OFFICE

 

Ty Fixed It!

TY WASHER

I’m not sure how he did it, but he wiggled some tubing around and now the washer works!  Thanks TY!

TY FEETIt’s like my washer and dryer are giving breech birth to him.TY WASHER BIRTH

35 day stretch…

CAM00343I’m working a 35 day uninterrupted stretch, and I really needed to clean my house today.  After triumphing over a vacuum repair, I was bummed to discover my washing machine is on the fritz.  As the device is less than a year old, this glitch makes me frown.  At least my house is clean now, even if I can’t do laundry.  I ain’t got time for testy appliances.  Fuck a boyfriend, I need a handyperson.FIX IT

After the premiere last night, I needed to sleep on my feelings about the new RHNY Housewife Kristen Taekman.  In a word – vacant.  Would it kill Andy to cast a intelligent woman to raise the discourse above girlish clichés and screeching hysteria?  I hate to say it, but since Bethenny left the RHNY the show has been extra boring and super fake.RHNY S 6People keep coming up to me and complaining of a sore throat.  I ask them if they have humidifiers.  They never do.  That’s why your throat hurts!  Moisten the air fool.HUMIDIFY

Skills for Life: Accountability

MISS WILCOXLately, accountability is my trigger.  I work really hard at keeping my word.  Sometimes I fail (eehhm late post), but when I act irresponsibly I feel it with a heavy heart.  Am I the only one?  Last month, I tried to plan a trip with a friend and she just wouldn’t get back to me.  I asked two different people to help with home repairs, both committed to a specific day, both bailed.  A friend still owes me money from this fall.  When I plan a dinner now, I just assume someone will back out with a bullshit excuse at the last minute – because someone always does. ACCOUNTABILITY DOODLE I was going deep with my friend the other night on the issue of accountability.  I was bitching about feeling let down.  She basically informed me my expectation that people follow through is unrealistic.  I should just accept that most people are flaky, and if I did I would feel less dismay.  No doubt there’s some wisdom there, but aren’t basement level expectations doing everyone a disservice?  I expect more out of myself, and I expect more out of you.  The universe is a tricky mistress.  As soon as I started sending out an energetic desire for accountability, who comes along to offer help?  An unusually sexy and handsome accountant.  For crying out loud.  ACCOUNTANT

a kitchen corner

CAM00611Welcome to my kitchen corner.CAM00616Shelves and cabinet = Ikea.

CAM00607CAM00610Bob Marley Mug.CAM00619

CAM00618CAM00609CAM00608

4 for Friday: Travel. Renew. Wait. Waste.

7 MILE BEACHThis time of year has me contemplating white sandy beaches.  Last year it was Hawaii.  This year I’m thinking the Caribbean.  Do I go cheap and sketchy (Jamaica, Dominican Republic) or pay more for the false security of the USVI?  I hate to be a neo-colonialist paranoid asshole, but I also don’t want a side order of sexual assault or armed robbery with my fun in the sun.  JAMAICAAfter visiting in person this fall, I predicted Bethenny’s shit talk show would not see a season 2.  Still no clear word on renewal, though there have been rumors of a retooling that would take the focus off celebrities and down shift into conflict (via naughtybutnicerob).  From the look of it, the show isn’t expensive to produce, so she does have that going for her.  However, I don’t think conflict confrontation/resolution is the right direction for her to go in season 2.  She shines when she sticks to her strengths: remaking recipes, debating diet experts, and confronting unlikable reality stars.  Can you stretch that into 5 shows a week and keep it fresh?BETHENNY FRANKELDid you watch Downton Abbey?  Many of you are catching this season for the first time as it airs on American television.  Some criticized the first episode of the season describing it as boring and repetitious.  Stay tuned.  A major moment of violence changes everything downstairs.  When the scene aired in the U.K., it had the fans atwitter in anger.DOWNTON ABBEYI’m going to say what nobody else in the Coven has the nerve to – that was a shameful waste of Steve NicksSTEVIE NICKS AHS

 

INC R-2 ROLLER BALL PEN

INCE R2 ROLLERBALL BLACKI was at my friend Hil’s a little while ago.  I needed a pen and she handed me this INC R-2 Roller Ball.  I began to write.  “This pen is sexual.”  I said.  “Right?!” she agreed.  There is a consensus.  INC R-2 Roller Balls are the shit.  Then she generously gave it to me.  She’s just that type of friend – a really good pen-giving friend.  Hil procures her INC R-2 Roller Balls at the dollar store.  INC R2 MULTI COLOR

At Home Jessner

DERMALURE JESSNER LGA few weeks ago, I discovered you can buy full strength professional Jessner peels online without a license.  Imagine my horror/surprise/delight when an ounce costs less than $25.  How can you not be delighted at that price?  The horror arose at the thought I’d been paying 4x that for one peel application at the spa.  I’m surprised that regulators would allow laypeople to self-administer such a product.  SKIN OBSESSION JESSNER KITI admit I was scared and worked up a number of dreadful self-maiming scenarios.  After sitting on the product for over a week, I decided to administer my own peel.  I do things my own way.  I’ll tell you how I did it, and you can customize your routine accordingly.  MAJOR PEELI prepare a clean face with a thin layer of coconut oil.  A barrier cream helps prevent over-peeling in sensitive areas – for me around the eyes and mouth.  PEEL FACENext I prepare a neutralizing solution.  Fill a large bowl with boiling water.  Add baking soda until it stops fizzing.  Very scientific, I know.  LET COOL.  Confirm the neutralizing solution is room temperature before proceeding.  Procure a clean washcloth.  Put it in the neutralizing solution.  (Some kits come with a neutralizing solution.)BAKING SODANow I have an exit strategy in place should the hellfire burn of the acid prove too intense for my fragile constitution.FAINTING LADYFor application I prefer Swisspers hypoallergenic cotton rounds. SWISSPERSI strongly recommend the use of gloves and safety eyewear.  EYE SAFETYApply peel to cotton pad.  I begin on the “tougher” areas like the forehead, cheeks, and jawline.  For me, these areas take longer exposure to secure a decent peel.  Then I fill in more sensitive areas like the nose and areas of the face that express movement.  I tend to peel deeper and faster in these areas. JESSNER PEEL CHEEKS CHINI complete one pass over the whole face and a quick second pass over more troublesome areas.  Because it burns like the dickens, I don’t leave it on very long (3 minutes max) and I don’t achieve full frosting, but I am not a cake so I’m at peace with it.  I use the excess product with a wipe to the back of my hands and bottoms of my feet. FROSTINGTo halt the process, gently submerge face in the bowl of neutralizer and then gently apply the washcloth.  The burning immediately subsides.BOWL OF WATERThe treatment resulted in a light all-over peel.  It was pretty even, but there was definitely deeper peeling at the temples and less peeling at the forehead.  I will keep this in mind for next time. PEEL DAY FOURI didn’t go big and I’m glad I didn’t.  As you know, the recovery time associated with a Jessner can be brutal.  I appreciate controlling the intensity and timing to minimize the recovery-related inconvenience.PEEL BEFORE AFTERTHIS PEEL IS NOT FOR AMATEURS.   Seriously though, I don’t know where you get more dramatic results for under $30 bucks.  Explore cautiously.BIG JESSNER PEEL

i resolve…

LISTENI resolve to listen.TAKE BETTER CAREI resolve to take better care of myself. OLD RESENTMENTSI resolve to let go of old resentments.DAILY POST

I resolve to post everyday because you bitches yell at me when I skip a day and I love you for it.

WORK HARDER AND SMARTERI resolve to work harder and smarter.DETACHI resolve to remain detached from the outcome.  LOVE V FEARI resolve to make decisions based on love and not fear.