VIRGO
Practice self-preservation.
LIBRA
Pick a side.
SCORPIO
Prepare to ramp it up.
SAGITTARIUS
Let it be easy breezy.
CAPRICORN
The frivolity of summer is over.
AQUARIUS
Go out of your way to be friendly.
PISCES
You are a valued friend.
ARIES
One word: edit.
TAURUS
Don’t confuse selfishness for martyrdom.
GEMINI
Make a list.
CANCER
Clean and organize.
LEO
Moodiness makes you seem self-important.
Justice, a Cardinal Virtue, in the most literal sense symbolizes looming legal entanglements. The emergence of this card means there will be an even-handed resolution to the conflict. Withhold your jubilation; folks are rarely satisfied with what is objectively fair. The scales mirror Libra, and this is your card. Beyond the obvious implications, Justice asks whether you’ve balanced your quest for earthly ambition with spiritual growth? This is about accountability and harsh truth. Adjust yourself toward equilibrium. When reversed, beware of bias.
The Hermit depicts a Capuchin, holding a lantern, shining the light of the occult in search for truth. Ninth of the Major Arcana, this is the card of attainment through self-illumination. The tasks associated with this card are reading, cleaning, organizing, rest, and contemplation. Associated with Virgo, virgins, this is your card. Take on an ascetic sensibility of slow deliberation to find enlightenment and clarity. When this card surfaces in relation to others, it symbolizes an inspirational guide who brings understanding to the mysterious and confusing. The Hermit is someone that you connect with outside your regular social circle, typically one-on-one. When construed negatively, The Hermit represents withdrawal, isolation, and navel-gazing.
Eighth of the Major Arcana, Strength is about conquering your inner-beast. It is easy to fall prey to our basest instinct, but what separates us from animals is our ability to overcome these tendencies with will power. Metaphorically, the maiden tames the lion, just as we must tame our impulses. Leos, this is your card. Don’t forget the essential components of gentleness and kindness which temper the fire of Strength. Confront your doubt, but embrace yourself with mercy and compassion.
LEO
Find a way to shine your light on someone who needs it.
VIRGO
Be careful not to overheat.
LIBRA
Embrace the change.
SCORPIO
Throw out all your calculations.
SAGITTARIUS
Your obsequious flirting undermines your sincerity.
CAPRICORN
You owe someone an apology.
AQUARIUS
Find a way out of your head.
PISCES
Don’t waste your time feeling guilty.
ARIES
Your polished demeanor can make you unsympathetic.
TAURUS
Challenge your assumptions.
GEMINI
For you, anticipation is the worst part.
CANCER
Time to regroup.
In gratitude for your unwavering support of Demeter Clarc, here is a special Birthday Horoscope just for you.
The Crab can make its home wherever it likes, and you have utilized this trait to reinvent yourself. Your nurturing bosom comforts all those around you. It is no surprise you were born under the sign of the boobies. You are the human equivalent of a warm blanket, fresh from the dryer. You experience feelings deeply. Joy and love fill your life, yet you suffer under the weight of crippling sadness. Despite your tendency to get tangled, don’t get it twisted: you are a survivor.
CANCER
Happy Birthday! Get ready to put up your dukes.
LEO
You are hiding a secret that will be revealed.
VIRGO
You are especially bored by the mundane.
LIBRA
You are gorgeous, now what else?
SCORPIO
Devote time to quiet study.
SAGITTARIUS
Reign in your fiery anger.
CAPRICORN
Find some levity.
AQUARIUS
Ask yourself the tough questions.
PISCES
Your careful planning will pay off.
ARIES
Be careful of buying into your own mythology.
TAURUS
Not everything can be rationalized.
GEMINI
Despite your vacillations, your heart is steady and true.
GEMINI
Gratitude will change your outlook.
CANCER
You will glow like the sun this month.
LEO
When rooted, you flourish.
VIRGO
Quiet yourself and let the truth surface.
LIBRA
Your suspicions are right on.
SCORPIO
Reign in your self-indulgence.
SAGITTARIUS
Reach out to someone you miss.
CAPRICORN
Acknowledge, then forgive.
AQUARIUS
Follow through.
PISCES
Grow up and move on.
ARIES
Stand on your own merit.
TAURUS
Your generosity will be rewarded.
TAURUS
You get more done before noon than most people do all day, but once in a while you really need to sleep in.
GEMINI 
Your hard work and true heart are appreciated.
CANCER 
Your ass is getting big because you won’t get off it.
LEO 
You are beautiful and you know it, that’s why other people hate you.
VIRGO
You have demonstrated admirable commitment and now you will reap the benefits of your hard work.
LIBRA 
Let go of your concerns for the future.
SCORPIO
Soak up all the love you are offered.
SAGITTARIUS 
You will be rewarded for your self-control.
CAPRICORN 
You are greatly admired and don’t even know it.
AQUARIUS 
Stop coming on so strong, it comes off insincere.
PISCES
You continue to grow, but still make bad decisions.
ARIES
Let others shine this month, your humility will endear you to others.