Tag Archives: Annie

That weekend I ate a $10 box of crackers.

LESLEY STOWE RAINCOAST CRISPS FIG AND OLIVERemember when I went to Pitchfork in Chicago this summer?  My most vivid recollection of that weekend was consuming an entire box of fancy crackers at my friend’s house.  Only after a recent trip to Whole Foods did I learn that I had snacked away an entire $10 package.  I’m such a shitty house guest, for real.  Forgive me.  Your Lesley Stowe Raincoast Crisps were so tasty I couldn’t resist.   I promise to fortify your fancy cracker supply Anne-Marie.  To think that without your influence, I could have gone my whole life and never tried a $10 cracker.  LESLEY STOWE RAINCOAST CRISPS CHERRY AND HAZELNUTMORE RAINCOAST CRISPS

Burt’s Bees Herbal Blemish Stick

BURT'S BEES BLEMISH STICKMy friend Anne-Marie absolutely swears by Burt’s Bees Herbal Blemish Stick.  Her complexion glows, so she’s worth a listen.  The potent and fragrant botanical blend soothes inflammation without aggravating peeling.  The rollerball application is downright fun too. BURT'S BEES BLEMISH STICK UNCAPPEDBurt’s Bees Herbal Blemish Stick is a powerful alternative to traditional acne treatments.  I warn that sensitive folks won’t enjoy the intense aroma or the tingly burny sensation.  Keep it away from your eyes.  For real.  Beauties who enjoy a natural product, this little wonder stick is worth keeping in the arsenal to address those rude little imperfections.INGREDIENTS BURTS BEES BLEMISH STICK

Would You Rather?

Would you rather have your car washed and gassed every week or receive a pair of diamond earrings?Me = care for the car bitch. Would you rather couple with someone of means with no sex drive or a poor person who is always pawing at you?Me = desire over dinero. Would you rather take an exotic trip with four people you barely know or stay home alone?Me = I’d rather be domestically bored than internationally annoyed. Would you rather have 1 oz of premium chocolate or a whole bag of Hershey’s?Me = It’s chocolate so I’ll take either in a pinch, but quality over quantity. Would you rather have a $100,000 home that is paid for or a $1,000,000 home with a mortgage? Me = free and clear. 

 

eat me: island edition

So you’ve heard it before, but it bears repeating, traveling on the Hawaiian Islands is fucking astronomically expensive.  Know what else is surprising?  The food is consistently mediocre and totally overpriced (You were so RIGHT Annabella!), even for vegetarians.After navigating three different islands over the last 9 days, I’ve picked up a few strategies for cutting culinary costs.  In preparing for this trip, I came across a lot of advice.  Most of it was useless.  My aim here is to offer up some helpful non-obvious information.For instance, one of the most common recommendations I read on the internet before coming to Hawaii is to hit up the COSTCO.  If you are rolling a week deep with a family of four, perhaps that is a smart move for you.  However, think about whether or not you can really get through COSTCO-size servings before you return home.  The tendency is to overbuy and end up wasting.  Not a good look.  Buy only the essentials in quantities you can use during your trip.  You aren’t really saving money if you throw half of it away.Remember as a general rule, in Hawaii nothing comes with anything.  Order a veggie burger for $8; don’t expect fries.  Realistically expect to pay another $5 for fries.  First, decided if you MUST have fries.  If the answer is yes, then decide if you need a whole order to yourself.  If not, share.  Sharing is caring.They also really love “wraps” here, so expect a lot of burrito-shaped foods.  Grab a wrap and then buy extras like chips and a drink at a convenience store to avoid the deli-style markup.Make this a vegetarian vacation.  You’ll pay more for vegetarian food here than on the mainland – which by the way makes no fucking sense since many of the veggies are grown locally – but vegetarian dishes are still less expensive than anything else on the menu.  (Why not try some taro?)  Plus, sticking with veggies will keep you looking good in your swimwear and ward off  pesky travel constipation.  Don’t act like you don’t get backed up bitch.Generally speaking, the exploitative resorts have pretty crappy food served in the least interesting environment.  What you are essentially paying for here is a premium on convenience.  If the timing or circumstances of your travel require a meal on the property, skirt the ridiculous up-charge on room service by walking your lazy ass down and picking up carry-out from the bar.  Skip the “fanciest” restaurant on the property and just stick to the bar and cafe – almost always the food is all coming out of the same kitchen anyway.Let me caution you on the hyperbole-laced shaved ice.  I was standing in the grocery store in Waimea looking at postcards when I heard the check-out girl exclaim “Oh No!”  A customer passed the fuck out in the check out line.  I pulled her up on my lap, got her some water, called her friends, and waited with her until the paramedics arrived.  What took her down?  Shaved Ice. Poor girl had too much sugar, too much heat, and not enough quality nutrition.  After that bad churro took me down at Coachella, I learned my lesson about the overly sweet snacking, especially in the heat.  While that $5 shaved ice looks tempting, skip it for a low-glycemic, substantive option.By the way, don’t ever be the dork at the luau.  So Fucking Lame.  I’m sorry, but I don’t think we can be friends if you attend a rude pig-sacrificing luau.

Mai e `ai

Saturday in Sedona

I’m meditating in the desert bitches.

Brow Addendum: Castor Oil

My girl Annie sent me an email that I think is worth sharing with you.  Annie is an eyebrow goddess, and therefore I implicitly trust her advice (though I haven’t yet tried this trick myself).

Here is her brow wisdom.

DC,

Two words for you:  castor oil.  Rub it in 2 times a day, then use what remains on a finger on lashes.  You’ll find it is in almost all brow/lash growth products, and that is actually how I fell upon that beauty jam.

Love,

AM

Castor oil has many useful applications, including breaking up scar tissue I hear.  One word of caution, after some advice from a well-known body worker, my friend Trisha rubbed castor oil all over her midsection in an effort to break up scar tissue from a gnarly accident and subsequent surgeries.  Trish tends to do things balls to the wall and the intensity of her bedtime castor oil application wasn’t any exception.  The next morning after a vigorous 2 hour yoga intensive, Trisha darted back to her apartment, but didn’t quite make it before she shit her pants.  Even worse?  She dropped her drawers and ran up the stairs Porky Pig style (shirt + no pants), and a dude was walking his dog in the alley and caught her bare shitty ass running up the stairs.  Let Trisha’s humiliation serve as your warning.  Castor oil is great, but take it easy or you can shit your pants.

FAIRYDROPS

My girl Anne-Marie and I have a friendly rivalry going over which mascara is superior Blinc or FAIRYDROPS.  She recently tucked some FAIRYDROPS into a care package for me, and I have to admit FAIRYDROPS Scandal Queen is pretty fucking fantastic. Developed in Tokyo, FAIRYDROPS is extremely smudge-resistant as well as lengthening.  If you like the bright-eyed doll look (and really who doesn’t?), then FAIRYDROPS is for you.

When compared eye to eye with Blinc how did FAIRYDROPS fare?  In terms of hardcore durability, it goes to BlincBlinc withstands smudging under the harshest circumstances.  When it does dissolve, it releases in an avalanche of tiny spiderleg tubes.  Both FAIRYDROPS and Blinc are equally lengthening, but FAIRYDROPS definitely delivers more volume.  In addition, FAIRYDROPS has a far more conditioning formula compared to Blinc’s.  Ultimately, I think it makes sense to keep both top-shelf products in your arsenal and use them appropriately for each day’s different beauty demands.

Embryolisse Lait-Crème Concentré

Remember my girl Anne-Marie, who is the world’s best gift giver?  Well, she’s done it again.  Freshly returned from washing a man out of her hair in Paris, the generous little dove smuggled home a tube of cult fav Embryolisse Lait-Crème Concentré just for lil ol’ me.  (Thanks AMP!)

Fuck a duck if it isn’t great.  The French may not do everything well, but they can make a face cream, and Embryolisse Lait-Crème Concentré is a fine example of their mastery of skincare.  A mid-weight, non-greasy moisturizer and primer, Embryolisse Lait-Crème Concentré is mildly active but non-irritating.  It soothes redness and dryness without prompting breakouts. 

Embryolisse Lait-Crème Concentré is one of those great multi-use products that makeup artists and die-hard beauty cultists love.  Time-tested and dependable, it is worth the extra effort to find Embryolisse Lait-Crème Concentré.  There isn’t anything else quite like it.

a weekend on the mat

I confess I’m spending another weekend on the mat at a yoga retreat.  I know, I know, I’m not Jennifer Aniston. My good buddy is coming into town and we are going to spend the weekend working our practice for 6 hours a day.  Some of you stopped reading right there.  We’ll bend and twist in so many obscene ways.  Here are a few of the poses we’ll play with in case you are morbidly curious…