Tag Archives: dance

Fast Forward

FAST FORWARD DANCINGI love using the internet to reconnect with random and obscure pieces of nostalgia from my childhood.  When I was a kid, I loved a dance movie (who didn’t?).  Girls Just Want to Have FunFlashdance. Dirty DancingFast Forward.  Haven’t heard of that last one?  Fast Forward tells the tale of 8 struggling performers from Sandusky, Ohio who set off to NYC with a hope and a dream to win a record label’s annual talent showcase.  I loved this corny mess and watched it on replay.FAST FORWARD ARRIVAL NYC It was directed by Sidney Poitier and Quincy Jones served as the executive music producer, but don’t let those names fool you into thinking this is a quality film.  Everything about Fast Forward is totally silly.  It also has everything I like in one movie: 1) A delightful apartment makeover montage; 2) A dance-off; 3) Women fighting off rapists by kicking them in the balls; and 5) Dance pant moose knuckles.DANCE OFF FF Furthermore, upon rewatching, I’m pretty sure this floppy disco-tittied movie is the origin of my own personal anti-bra policy.    FAST FORWARD DANCE

The Current Rotation: junetune

 

JAZMINE SULLIVANDumb × Jazmine Sullivan featuring Meek Mill GOING HOME ASGEIRGoing Home × Ásgeir NOUVELLE VAGUE BAND A PARTDancing with Myself × Nouvelle Vague SCISSOR SISTERS TAKE YOUR MAMATake Your Mama × The Scissor Sisters

bottle service at da club

BETA

Last night, I was invited to da club to enjoy the full VIP bottle service experience.  Rolling six deep with a gold digger, a missed-connection, Pippi Longstocking, a purse watcher, a narcoleptic, and an adderall-popping cunt, we were stamped, wristbanded, and escorted past the velvet ropes to the special elevator that took us upstairs where we could gaze down upon the sweaty rolling stink writhing below.  This elitist bullshit is so not my scene.  Other than having a place to sit, I really don’t get bottle service.  Open carafes of juice are a bad idea around drunk people.  Is there an expectation that the six of us finish this bottle of vodka?  I just drank the bottled water because everything else appeared so unsanitary.  The best part of the whole evening was watching the kiddos roll their faces off down below.  I saw a titty come out, and it made my night.  Can we talk about the go-go dancers?  Why do they all still dance like they are juggling a spaceball?  90′s nostalgia?  Give me something new girls.  Give me something more interesting than your lower butt cleavage.  From my vantage point, with rare exception the dudes can’t dance.  The repetitive pounding house beats of the well-known DJ got super fucking old super fucking quick.  Really with the glow sticks?  The main redeeming factor was when the group of handsome gentlemen at the table next to us mistook me as 10 years younger.  I’m sure it was clubby darkness and context, but just let me savor the sad little moment, okay?  Thanks.  BETA A GOGO

Com Truise

COM TRUISE MELTCom Truise fucked my face off tonight.  COM TRUISE

The Most Annoying People at the Rock Show

BUTT GRABThe guy who leads his girlfriend around by the ass.FLAILING BITCHES

The woman who over-enthusiastically dances to the band’s two hit songs and then texts, talks loudly, and gets sloppy-ass drunk for the remainder of the show.

BRAD PITT DORK DANCEThe interpretative dancer who gesticulates in accord with the lyrics.  RAISE THE ROOF

The slutty underage Forever 21-clad girls who skank around the drink line begging guys to buy them beer.

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

 

The Current Rotation: Good-bye July

WHEN I WAS YOUR MANWhen I Was Your Man × Bruno Mars RIHANNA STAYStay × Rihanna (feat. Mikky Ekko)SAVAGESShut Up × SavagesMUDDY WATERS HONEY BEEHoney Bee × Muddy WatersGET DOWN

 

Listen. Read. Snack.

DAFT PUNK RANDOM ACCESS MEMORIESEven though sometimes listening to Daft Punk feels a like a serenade from an ATM machine, I admit that I must unabashedly break into car dance everytime I hear Instant Crush featuring Julian Casablancas from Random Access Memories. CAR DANCEG-sus, Meg Wolitzer turns a memorable and meaty phrase in The InterestingsMEG WOLITZERFLAX4LIFE MUFFSWho doesn’t love a muffy in the morning?  These tough muffs look like something geriatrics eat to stay regular, but I love these hearty, rib-sticking, omega-filled Flax4Life Blueberry Flax Muffins.  Unlike most commercial baked goods, these not-too-sweet slow burners will tied you over until lunch.FLAX4LIFE MUFFIN

 

The Current Rotation

Passion Pit • Constant ConversationsAlthea & Donna • Uptown Top Ranking Other Lives • Folk Songs (thanks Leah Love)Bat for Lashes • I’m on FireKimbra • Plain Gold Ring (live)

Sunday with Josephine Baker