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Happy Birthday Scorpio! The month of November celebrates gratitude, and you can be sure that more than a few are grateful for you. Unlike some of their astrological brethren, Scorpios aren’t attention-seeking stunt queens. Rather, this enigmatic sign attracts others because they are mysterious and interesting. Scorpios have a quiet and under-credited talent for bringing folks together. Dependable and loyal friends, Scorpios add texture to the social circle – as long as they aren’t crossed. The upcoming year has much in store for you Scorpio. The theme of the last quarter of the year is self-improvement. More specifically, what can you leave behind in 2012 that is no longer serving you? Purge vampiric people and habits and begin anew. Embrace the best and worst of what’s to come free from unnecessary burdens.
Brave Sags are prepping to for the holidays (perhaps hosting their very first Thanksgiving this year?), and with that responsibility comes heaps of anxiety. You understandably want everything to be perfect down to the last yam, but release some of the perfectionistic pressure or your ass is going to blow. Besides, like all meals, there will be highlights and lowlights. Remember, no one expects Martha Stewart. After the holidays, prepare for a bit of an energy crash which triggers some reevaluation on your part. Sags act as loving caretakers, and this physical dedication at times tricks others into believing that you are present when you really aren’t. What disservice are you doing yourself and your relationships when you dial it in absentmindedly?
The winter holidays get Caps all nostalgic for home and family traditions. You tend to romanticize the past and get a little weepy and lovelorn this time of year. This unusual foray into your feelings brings out a tenderness that others find endearing. Reconsider indulging your moodiness just like you would that second helping of pie. A packed schedule delivers the end of the year in a flurry. Prioritize the most important commitments. Duck out of less critical gatherings early. Take opportunities for extra cash and then spoil your loved ones rotten.
Oh Aquarius, what a delightful presence you add this November. Level-headed and neutral, others find your company comforting and non-political when competing interests create tension. New friends (and perhaps more?) come your way. Add them to your already wide circle of acquaintances. Lately a few basic responsibilities have been overlooked because Aquarius is too busy examining the meaning of life or whatever existential bullshit occupies your mind. We all appreciate a little esoteric thinking now and again, but don’t forget somebody has to pay the electric bill and load the dishwasher. At the very least scrub the toilet. You know it’s been an embarrassingly long time.
Pisces fills November with equal amounts of fun and work. You deserve some extra credit for striking an elegant balance between competing commitments. Style-wise, it is time for an overhaul. You love cutesy shit, and that’s all fine, but at some point consider a grown-up investment in quality pieces. It would not kill you to purchase an impeccably tailored classic garment. Pisces in love continue to cook in the kitchen and the bedroom. Make sure the calories from one activity offset the other. Even though Pisces are gettin’ it good, that’s no excuse to let yourself go – quite the opposite actually.
Aries enters a full-on plaza queen phase in November, complete with a ton of high maintenance demands. Thankfully, Aries add a lot to the party, so most of the antics get a pass. Add please and thank you liberally. A snappy outfit boosts your mood at anxiety-inducing social obligations. Put some thought into what you want to wear, and you’ll have more confidence as a result. Aries work hard and deserve a break; try to steal some afternoons for lying around on the sofa. Eat high quality food and lay off the drinking. Now is the time when your body is most vulnerable, and Aries need a strong immune system to survive the harsh winter months to come.
Taurus spent the last several months externalizing their energy towards others. After all this giving, what is left for you little dove? Since November is all about thanks, open yourself up to receiving gratitude rather than hastily brushing it aside. Let the kind words land. Bulls possess an unparalleled work ethic. Intellectually sharp, no bullshit, and driven, Taurus succeeds for obvious reasons. Interpersonally however, that same recipe won’t make for pleasing cake. Wear something subtly incredible to family gatherings. Good clothes act like armor against cutting comments.
Change ain’t easy, but Geminis have really pulled it together over the last few months. Well done indeed. You’ve taken responsibility for past mistakes and demonstrated positive growth. Maintain the forward momentum. Work demands significant resources for much of the month, but Gemini can look forward to an enjoyable and relaxing holiday…if you finish all your work on time. Generous, kind, and loving, Gemini shines this month and positivity radiates your central relationships. On balance, November looks very kind to your pocketbook, social life, and bedroom.
Lovely Cancers enjoy nothing more than a table full of food surrounded by a large and loving family. Whether hosting or attending, many Crabs get their wish this year and make the most of it, though overindulgence may have you swimming in regret. On the upside, at least you’ll be exercising. Burn off some extra calories and guilt by doing the dishes. Cancers get wrapped up in their own perceptions, much of which are utter bullshit. Sorry, it’s true. Step out of the walls of the past depression, self-doubt, and bad decision-making and start running your life.
Leo, lemme tell you the truth. It is super rude to constantly let your eyes wander during a conversation. That habit demonstrates a fundamental belief that many Leos hold: that there is always something better just over the shoulder of the person they are talking to. Because they are so big, bright, and bold, Leos take for granted the amount of attention they receive. Turn some of that radiance back around to the depleted masses huddled around your glowy flame. When making clothing selections, camouflage becomes an increasingly important consideration. Do you want to be a creative dresser or rock a killer figure?
Virgos’ singular intent and drive makes them super effective, but also self-righteous and narrow-minded at times. A generous and caring friend and companion, know that your inner circle deeply cares for you. Virgos grow more selective with their expenditure of time and energy as they grow wiser. Remember that if you want an area of your life to grow, you have to nourish it. If you really want to manifest change, then provide the space for that change to happen. Otherwise, it’s just lip service, and we all know you are a person of action. Virgo’s style inspiration for this winter is dewy on the tundra. Bonus points for those who get the reference.
November serves up a round of disappointments to Libra. You’ve spent a great deal of time planning things which cannot be planned. There’s that expression, we plan and God laughs. That cliché is your theme song this month. So what can you control? How about your own reaction to disappointing news? Libras can stew in self pity and entitlement or dust themselves off and get back on the ornery old nag that is life. To your credit, you’ve stylishly adapted to a number of challenges that have shifted your life in unexpected ways. Cultivate yourself in the soil where the wind decided you should land. No one is suggesting you hand your life over to the whim of fate, just recognize where your power lies and where it does not.
Fuck for 100 minutes.Rearrange furniture for 67 minutes.
Shop if you must: 3 hours, 6 minutes. Catch up on sleep; 8.5 hours burns approximately 500 calories.Mop your dirty ass floors for 100 minutes.
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