Tag Archives: Julie Bowen

Sunday Birthday Party

Glen E. FriedmanTone-Lōc Jessica BielAlexander Graham BellJean HarlowJulie BowenLee Radziwill

2012 SAG Awards: saggy nutsackery

No single attendee of the the 2012 SAG Awards snatched “best dressed” by a landslide; rather this red carpet showed subtle improvements – like Tilda Swinton in Lanvin, and not so subtle disappointments like a gawd-awful green Emily Blunt in Oscar de la RentaMany will point to Lea Michele in Versace as best dressed.  Does she look good?  Yes.  Would I be disgusted with myself to name her best dressed?  Yes.  I’m just not personally feeling this silhouette right now.  Even though certain designers are pushing this awkward tea length it’s so hard to wear, as proven by Emma Stone in Alexander McQueen. Michelle Williams wore Valentino.  From the waist up, it is magnificent.  The shoes and bracelet aren’t right.  I’m torn on the subtle asymmetrical hem.  She werks the Mia Farrow better than anyone, no?Jessica Chastain let Calvin Klein sculpt her bosom to delightful results.  One of the best of the night.  What the fuck Kristen Wiig?  Explain this deranged necklace choice.  Shame on you for ruining a Balanciaga with a bad choker. Shall we discuss the couples?  Pitt wore Balenciaga and Jolie wore a Jenny Packham gown reminiscent of a Hefty bag.  Clooney wore Armani and Keibler wore a boring black lace Marchesa.  Is the dress boring or is she?  Both?Me likey Melissa McCarthy’s drapey Badgley Mischka and Natalie Portman in Giambattista Valli too. Glenn Close went big in Zac PosenDiane Lane wasted her incredible body in David Meister. Vergara and Bowen in Marchesa and Temperely London respectively.  I’m not moved by either.Weird whites: Rose Byrne taking a risk in a jumpsuit, (p.s. Is she filming the Anna Wintour biopic with that new hair?)…Zoe Saldana wore Givenchy and it didn’t photograph well.  Viola Davis brought the twins to the party in Marchesa. Let’s end on a high note with Kyra in Pucci, though let this serve as a cautionary tale against tattoos.  The ink on the rib cheapens the look.

emmy 2011 style review: red, wrong, and blue

The best and worst of the A-list: Kate Winslet in Elie Saab and Gwyneth Paltrow in PucciGwyneth’s face looks better than it has in a while, but the dress is confusing and wrong.  A transparent midriff, really G?Another disappointing turn for Katie Holmes in Calvin Klein Collection.  Bad fit, uninspired color, and boring shoes combined to create another dud for Mrs. CruiseEvan Rachel Wood provided a refreshing relief from the onslaught of red in an immaculately tailored Elie Saab.

Hate to say Christina Hendricks looked unnecessarily big in an embellished Johanna Johnson gown.  The open toe and low heeled shoe makes her legs appear chunky.  A darker tressed Elisabeth Moss stayed in the same color family as her co-star in a pinky-nudish Marchesa adorned with shimmering vines.  Damn, I miss Mad Men.Let’s get the Glee bitches out of the way: self-important Lea Michele vamping for the flashbulbs in Marchesa, Jenna Ushkowitz in an architectural Ghadah Paris, and Diana Agron in Roskanda Ilinic. Naya Rivera’s chic, black, subtly-detailed gown made Heather Morris‘ selection look fussy by comparison. Colfer proves that photographically satin betrays both genders.  Darren Criss showed up his more well-known cast mate in a slender suit by John Varvatos. Of the hostesses, Cat Deeley didn’t embarrass herself or wow in Monique L’Huillier.  I question the clutch choice with this particular gown.  Even with ample style resources, Padma Lakshmi in Armani Privé and Heidi Klum in Christian Siriano reinforce the notion that most models can’t dress themselves worth a shit. You would think that the Fashion Police might dress a skosh more fashionably, right?  Giuliana wore a crimson Cavalli which got lost in the sea of red gowns.  Kelly Osbourne did a bit better in plum J. Mendel.  However, for someone who regularly critiques others for failing to make fashion forward choices, this safe dress felt more Lea Michele than Kelly Osbourne.  Though let’s face it, none of these third tier hangers-on get first pick of the best gowns. Prettier than most ladies, how about a little Mario Lopez palette cleanser?  Werk those dimples son. Joel McHale also looked dapper and fresh in his icy tux coat. Not much better than that dreadful Wonder Woman costume, Adrianne Palicki arrived in anti-photogenic satin.  Super likable Connie Britton looked lovely in a deeper shade of the night’s most favored hue.  For a woman her age, the face and body are damn aspirational and underrated. Minka’s old lady Christian Dior underscored the impact of Galliano’s departure on the house.  This gown isn’t going to give Jeter any regrets.   Usually Claire does Narciso or Calvin Klein; instead she went in a different direction with this flashy Oscar de la Renta gown.  The perennially overrated Emily Blunt donned Elie SaabElie Saab provided many of the evening’s strongest looks, but this wasn’t one of them.  Why does she always have that just-ate-a-canary mug on her face?Julie Bowen did de la Renta this year and kept the accessories minimal.  Sofia Vergara rocked Wang (Vera not Alexander, obviously).  Don’t match the lipstick to the dress please.For comics,  Kristen Wiig impressed in ombre Zac Posen, and Amy Poehler rocked Peter Som.  Her dress was featured right here on Demeter Clarc in the best of blue for Fall 2011 RTW.

Pint-sized Nina Dobrev was swallowed whole by bloodshot Donna Karan.   Hate the necklace too.  Margulies‘ unseasonable white Armani Privé evoked Styrofoam cup. Let’s finish strong and severe with Game of Thrones actress Lena Headey in Alessandra Rich.  A different bag and belt could have catapulted her from an eight to a ten.  The fantastic Christine Baranski served a seasonally appropriate dark blue Zac Posen and outshone many attendees half her age.

17th Annual SAG Fashion: the pretty and the shitty

Best dressed goes to Julie Bowen for her flattering and original Catherine Malandrino jumpsuit.  Julie gets the prize because this may be the best she’s ever looked.  Hitting her fashion stride, the choice highlighted her toned arms and tiny waist.  Christina Hendricks also deserves compliments for reining in her (allegedly enhanced) rack in this elegant long-sleeved L’wren Scott gown.  Modern and slimming, a much-improved showing for our Joanie. Yeah, yeah, Mila looked great in Alexander McQueen.  Finally, she picked a gown that does her justice.  She’ll be the obvious contender for “best dressed” among the mainstream critics.  It wouldn’t be a proper awards show without a Demeter Clarc selection making the cut.  This time Julia Stiles worked this Monique L’huillier ombre from the Pre-Fall 2011 collection.  Don’t love the uninspired hair, but she gives good gown. A trio of cap-sleeved gowns appeared on January Jones, Jenna Fischer, and Nicole KidmanJayma Mayes and Jennifer Lawrence worked detailed variations of the theme.  None were particularly spectacular. On the fug continuum, Jayma sits on the least offensive end and Jenna on the way, way, way other side.  Heather Morris, Kyra Sedgwick, and Sarah Hyland served sexy strapless.  Tina Fey, Winona Ryder, Claire Danes, Dianna Agron, Julianna Margulies, and Natalie Portman sucked all the seduction out of the silhouette.  Angie Harmon suffered from a serious case of overcompensation.  I’m so mad at WinonaThe one-shoulder women, tasteful Hilary Swank wearing Versace, and budget Kim Kardashian in Marchesa. While originality is always appreciated, the most interesting part of Eva Longoria’s Georges Hobeika gown was estimating how much titty tape went into tacking that strap down.  Sophia Vergara joked that she makes everything look like Cavalli.  Unfortunately, that means she makes Cavalli look like JovaniLea Michele came with a whole different take on the deep-V in Oscar de la Renta.  Overall, it was a very de la Renta-heavy evening.

GOLDEN GLOBES 2011: the chic and the weak

Best of the night, Anne Hathaway in a modern fashion-forward Armani Privé gown (featured here in best gowns of Fall 2010 waaaay back in August).

Worst of the night, Heidi Klum in Marc Jacobs serving Neapolitan nausea.

Calvin Klein Collection provided intense color and clean lines resulting in two of the most refreshing looks of the evening – Emma Stone and Claire Danes. The two biggest disappointments were Jennifer Lawrence in Louis Vuitton and Scarlett Johansson in Elie Saab.  These were not the most offensive gowns of the evening, but neither selection does its wearer justice.  Since this was one of Scarjo’s first appearances post-divorce announcement, her failure to turn it out is really inexcusable. More than ever, these mega-gowns feel really antiquated.  Catherine Zeta-Jones goes to prom in Monique L’huillier

Pretty pink princess Lea Michele joins her in Oscar de la Renta

Eva Longoria looks like she’s dragging her grief behind her in this Zac PosenWho invited Hewitt?

From the washed-up diva collection, Zuhair Murad dressed both Christina Aguilera and Jennifer LopezAwkward and abysmal asymmetry abounded; unfortch, no one executed this look correctly.

Julie Bowen in Tadashi Shoji - we want so much more for you Claire.

Julianne Moore tried her best to work a Lanvin dress that was in desperate need of a good steam.  Nicole Kidman bored us in Prada.Granny gown girls: Leighton Meester misfired again in Burberry and Michelle Williams continues her defiantly unappealing streak in Valentino. The two most overrated?  Sophia Vergara in Vera loves-a-sash Wang and Angelina Jolie in Versace.  Hey Angie, Joan Collins called and demanded you return her gown.  The most stylish and appropriately dressed youngin’ was Hailee Steinfeld in Prabal Gurung. Sarah Hyland could have used some guidance away from this fug Max Azria. Many folks will criticize Natalie Portman’s Viktor & Rolf gown, but who can be mad at this feminine display of whimsy?  Olivia Wilde deviated from the crowd with this full-skirted, sparkly, starry night Marchesa gown.  

The titty committee, January Jones in Versace and Halle Berry in Nina Ricci. The Glee girls gave good gownage.

Single-note strong colors adorn Kyra Sedgwick in Emilio Pucci and Elisabeth Moss in Donna Karan.

Most random?  A heavy-banged Sandra Bullock in Jenny Packham

Did Claire Get a Boob Job?

Fake tittays are whack.