Tag Archives: lawsuits

Waiting to Be Heard: A Memoir by Amanda Knox

AMANDA KNOX WAITING TO BE HEARD COVER ARTI just finished Waiting to Be Heard: A Memoir by Amanda Knox and much like everything about this girl I am deeply ambivalent.  How can a book be so boring and fascinating at the same time?  I believe she’s innocent, but that she’s also hiding something.AMANDA KNOX COURT ROOMNo doubt a healthy dose of sexism and anti-American sentiment played a major role in her demonization.  I empathize with her because I could easily see how the same thing could happen to many of us while abroad.  International travel.  Risky behavior.  Could you imagine the field-day they would have with this website?  G-SUS, I’d be tarred and feathered.KNOX PAPERS

The tale of the American in Perugia is lush with paradox.


Italians are almost as famous for their pasta as they are their anti-African sentiment.  I’m disgusted that during a round of intense interrogation she falsely accused an African, her boss Patrick.  Her accusations flamed the prejudicial racial hysteria.  Yet in an ironic twist, another African, Rudy Guede confessed, was convicted, and is now serving time for Meredith’s murder.

RUDY GUEDEThe prison medical staff erroneously informed Knox that she had AIDS.  She didn’t have AIDS, but she does describe contracting herpes from a makeout sesh with a hot dude she met on the train.  (Check out the meticulous brows, someone was threading her in the big house.)

AMANDA KNOX COLD SOREIf Knox were a better writer, she would have included even more details of her incarceration, however seemingly mundane.  She virtually glossed over the perversely interesting incidents of unwanted advances from different lecherous prison staff and fellow female prisoners.

AMANDA KNOX BEHIND BARSBased on her own descriptions of her personality, I suspect she’s rather annoying and lacking in self-awareness.  The constant Amélie comparisons make me want to heave.


Amanda’s memoir is dry and procedural with just a dusting of scandalous moments.  Quite obviously the investigation and trial were complete clusterfux poorly executed by bumbling, small town, murder scene novices.  The investigators blundered a high-profile international case and couldn’t admit the prosecution’s salacious and far-fetched theory was profoundly implausible.  This girl paid over a thousand days of her life for law enforcement’s stubborn unwillingness to broaden the search beyond Knox and Raffaele.  In all likelihood, the co-conspirator in Meredith’s murder walked away free because of it.


If nothing else, the memoir is a worthwhile cautionary tale which reminds us how sometimes shitty things happen to regular people for no good reason at all.



Bethenny Unleashes that Famous Scorpio Stinger

Recently, my friend broke up with a Scorpio and she’s moving out.  I told her she better hurry because Scorpios are spiteful.  Psst.  Someone might wanna tell Jason Hoppy.  He’s about to endure the psychological, physical, and spiritual spanking of his life.TMZ went snooping around the couple’s divorce papers, and by the slant of the intel I suspect Jason personally hand-delivered the documents to Harvey Levin’s desk. 

1) Bethenny seeks primary physical custody of Bryn.  (No big surprise there.)

2) Bethenny moved to enforce the prenup signed March 23, 2010.  (Definitely no surprise there.)

3) Frankel requested child support.  (Best characterized as a routine request in an atypical financial situation.)

4) She also asked for medical, dental, optical, therapeutic, and orthodontic expenses for both her and Bryn.  Is Bethenny Getting Braces?Bethenny suffers to lose significantly more from a drawn out split.  Much like Kris Humphries desperately clinging to the last burnt, bitter wisps of fame by refusing to divorce Kim, Jason can only benefit from making this separation process as tedious, embarrassing, and damaging to Bethenny as possible.  Bethenny and her well-compensated counsel better craft an unbelievably attractive agreement and apply some coercive tactics to get ink on it fast.

Betrothed, Butted, and Boring Blood

By now you’ve heard that Jen and Justin got engaged.  Why does their whole relationship smack of desperation?  Justin’s desperate to elevate himself to A-list relevancy and wealth.  Jen’s desperate to officially lock down a man before the tabloids permanently assign her the role of the heartbroken, left-behind spinster.  Can we expect a Mexican wedding?  Aniston loves her some Mexico.  Though some say the couple has already scouted locations in Greece.  Do we trust him?  Fuck No.  We want pre-nup. As an occasional watcher of Basketball Wives, I sadly wasn’t at all surprised to catch word that Chad allegedly head-butted Evelyn after she confronted him over a receipt for condoms.  He was arrested and charged, and has since been released from his contract by the Miami DolphinsEvelyn suffered a gash on her forehead and has apparently moved out of the couple’s home.  The two got married about 5 weeks ago.  Real messy ya’ll.

Finally, True Blood officially sucks now, right?  Just checking.


Bethenny and Jason on the Rocks?

We’ve all been on quite a ride with Mizz Frankel haven’t we?  At first, in the earliest days of RHNY, I was sort of fond of her.  Perhaps she was just the least offensive member of an all-around offensive group, but for the most part we were rooting for her.  As her fame, brand, and wealth grew, so did her narcissism, impatience, greed, and need for control.  In my opinion, her merger with Jason was just that – a calculated business decision aimed at furthering her appeal to a larger (more lucrative) audience.  Along came Bryn, and with her new baby Bethenny had all the the perfect ingredients to market cocktails, shapewear, skin care, books, and more to eager moms.  Not to mention Bethenny leveraged her new role as “mommy” to snag sponsorship deals with major players like PampersFirst during Bethenny Getting Married? and later throughout Bethenny Ever After, the couple’s total incompatibility became full-on apparent.  This last season grew so uncomfortable, I couldn’t even find the humor and fun in writing my silly little recaps.  So it comes as no surprise that rumors are flying concerning both parties consulting divorce lawyers.With divorce rumblings comes financial talk.  Several lawyers were asked to comment on what Jason is likely to gain from the split.  Now, I ain’t one to gossip, but I heard that Bethenny pushed Jason to sign a pre-nup and a revised post-nuptial agreement.  Trust, her assets are protected.  Based on her upbringing and past behavior, I contend that Bethenny would not jeopardize her fortune or her daughter’s future for any man.  Along with the rest of you, I’ve been predicting the demise of this showmance for sometime.  During a recent episode, a morsel of information slipped out that only served to cement my hunch about their impending split.  Bethenny stated that Jason goes to church every Sunday.  Specifically, she said “Jason goes,” the inference being that she stays home and he goes without her.  That struck me as a profound proof of the distance between these two.  Consider how much bullshit Jason endures for Bethenny.  How many events must he attend where she is the “star,” and he is the purse-holding husband pushed off the step-and-repeat so the paps can get a clean shot of the money maker?  She can’t spend one hour in church with the man?  Look, I’m no Bible beater, but church might actually do Bethenny some good.  Even if it didn’t, it would show a willingness to support Jason and do something as a family that isn’t 100% focused on Bethenny.  The trouble with the current version of Bethenny is that everything in her life and the lives of her hired sycophants is Bethenny-centric.  Why do you think Julie left?  And let’s not even get into all the unnecessary conflict Frankel caused with Jason’s salt-of-the-Earth parents…And as for the infidelity rumors with Matt Hesse?  The two clearly have chemistry, and Bethenny eyes him with a particular undeniable gleam during their on-air interactions.  He knows she wants him and he’ll milk her sexual attraction to maximize his professional and financial future.  He’s a self-proclaimed modelizer.  Obviously fucking Bethenny is a resume builder, not a dick stiffener.  Let her taste a bit of her own overly acidic Skinnygirl medicine with this handsome opportunist.  As this plays out, I predict the following:  1) First, the couple will offer a wave of denials until a confidential agreement is locked down tight; 2) Jason will NOT end up with anything close to half of Bethenny’s fortune, but she will overpay on the pre-nup/post-nup to preserve and protect her privacy and misdoings;  3) She will hold off announcing the split until after she finds out if her 6 week trial run talk show gets picked up for a full season (it won’t).

4 for Friday

As I’m sure you’ve heard, Jessica Simpson had a big ass 9+ lbs baby girl aptly named Maxwell this week.  I think it is safe to say we all feel some collective relief knowing that intense gestation has come to a close.  These last few weeks looking at her behemoth belly has made me truly uncomfortable.  Think she will be able to meet her contractual obligations to Weight Watchers with a newborn baby?  Knowing what we do about Jessica, I wonder whether she’ll survive the early days of motherhood without substantial aid from her mom Tina.

Bethenny and Jason are completely screwed right?  If they are fighting this much on camera, what is happening off screen?  Just tell him to fuck off Bethenny.  You got your baby and more dough than you can spend.  Cut the dead weight and get a cabana boy.  Did you hear the rumor she hooked up with The Situation?  GROSS.Edvard Munch’s The Scream sold to an anonymous buyer for a record-breaking $120 million this week.  Is “anonymous buyer” code for Saudi Royal?Linda Evangelista was back in court this week seeking child support from billionaire baby daddy Francois-Henri Pinault.  Doesn’t he know she doesn’t get out of bed for less than $10,000 a day?  He’s getting a bargain rate at $46,000 a month.  

Mo Money Mo Problems

Wow, that didn’t take long.  By now many of you have heard the news that former managers filed suit against Bethenny Frankel for breach of contract and fraud, among other claims, according to the Hollywood Reporter.Allegedly, back in May of 2008, Bethenny retained Doug Wald of Raw Talent as her manager and promised him 10%.  He in turn connected her with APA in August of 2008, and subsequently introduced her to David Kanbar (who appears on BEA and brokered the Skyy Vodka deal).  In November of 2008, days before signing a Skinnygirl development deal, Frankel fired Wald.Over the last three years, Bethenny and David plotted to promote Skinnygirl and then sell it for a huge profit.  Now rumor has it Raw Talent wants 10% of the $120 million dollar deal plus $100 million in punitive damages.  Ever since the deal went down, Bethenny’s been saying mo money mo problems, and she wasn’t kidding.  Even if she wins, defending this suit could be very costly.  She’s writing a big check either way to cover settlement or litigation costs.  Welcome to the big leagues B, cheers!