Tag Archives: Linda Evangelista

it’s hot. do you stink?

Many of us want to get away from chemically-laden traditional antiperspirants, but how do we do this without sweating and stanking like some unwashed dready on Phish tour.  The 90’s are mercifully over.  It’s not a good look.  Or odor.At Coachella, my friend Annie told me this long-winded story about this great all-natural deodorant.  When she got to the end of her description of this magical product, she couldn’t remember the name of it.  Like porn without a money shot, I frustratingly informed her that such a build up without a climax is the conversational equivalent of blue balls.  A few days after we got home, she emailed me the name of her beloved mystery anti-stink – Herban Cowboy. Herban Cowboy makes natural deodorants aimed at men and women, but I prefer the version marketed to men.  It smells earthy and fresh and seems to incidentally mellow the sweat.  I wouldn’t trust it for a job interview or anything, but if you are looking to get away from controversial aluminum-based products consider Herban Cowboy’s vegan, natural deodorant. Why not unleash your natural funk?  Cover up all your pheromones with chemical blockers and you’ll never get laid.

4 for Friday

As I’m sure you’ve heard, Jessica Simpson had a big ass 9+ lbs baby girl aptly named Maxwell this week.  I think it is safe to say we all feel some collective relief knowing that intense gestation has come to a close.  These last few weeks looking at her behemoth belly has made me truly uncomfortable.  Think she will be able to meet her contractual obligations to Weight Watchers with a newborn baby?  Knowing what we do about Jessica, I wonder whether she’ll survive the early days of motherhood without substantial aid from her mom Tina.

Bethenny and Jason are completely screwed right?  If they are fighting this much on camera, what is happening off screen?  Just tell him to fuck off Bethenny.  You got your baby and more dough than you can spend.  Cut the dead weight and get a cabana boy.  Did you hear the rumor she hooked up with The Situation?  GROSS.Edvard Munch’s The Scream sold to an anonymous buyer for a record-breaking $120 million this week.  Is “anonymous buyer” code for Saudi Royal?Linda Evangelista was back in court this week seeking child support from billionaire baby daddy Francois-Henri Pinault.  Doesn’t he know she doesn’t get out of bed for less than $10,000 a day?  He’s getting a bargain rate at $46,000 a month.  

Kevyn Aucoin The Radiant Reflection

You bitches know I love a good stick foundation.  Usually, I’m loyal to Bobbi Brown without deviation, but an online coupon deal lured me to try Kevyn Aucoin’s The Radiant Reflection Solid Foundation.  I’m a fan of Aucoin’s Sensual Skin Enhancer for its intense coverage, so I looked forward to seeing what this brand could do in a convenient stick format.

It pains me to report The Radiant Reflection is a serious disappointment.  First, the colors are all named after six different supermodels:

Shalom Amber, Linda, Christy, Yasmeen, Beverly. The limited range makes finding the right shade challenging.

Some reviews complained of an odor; there are always some folks bitching about fragrance within the sensitive crowd.  I am not among them.  I have preferences, but am not wholeheartedly fragrance-resistant.  I mention this because I’m about to concur that this product does have a funky smell.  If otherwise the foundation performed beautifully, maybe the artificial smell would be less noticeable, but alas that is not the case.  Ultimately, the formula fails for lack of creaminess and blendability.  It applies with a cooling sensation, but then hovers on the skin without ever really sinking in to vanishing perfection.  This product takes work to look natural, and life is filled with enough work.  Back to Bobbi Brown, $4 savings per stick and foundation that melts into the skin providing flawless unspookable coverage.

 

Sunday with Naomi

Party Time Bitches

UNZIPPED

Today begins Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week where designers will present their spring 2011 collections.  Get in the mood by viewing arguably the best fashion movie ever made: Unzipped. This movie is old; it documents Isaac Mizrahi’s 1994 fall ready-to-wear collection.  Doesn’t matter, it holds up.  Filmed during the apex of the supermodel era, Unzipped is jam packed with cameos: Sandra Bernard, Cindy Crawford, Kate Moss, Carla Bruni, Naomi Campbell, Helena Christensen, Shalom Harlow, Amber Valletta, Eartha Kitt, and a tantrum-throwing Linda Evangelista (among many others). Mizrahi charms as his chubby nervous-nelly self, and his team of sycophants carve their own unique roles in this (pre-reality TV boom) documentary.  Endlessly quotable, this is an unmissable fashion cult classic.

SEPTEMBER 2010 HOROSCOPE

VIRGO

Practice self-preservation.

LIBRA

Pick a side.

SCORPIO

Prepare to ramp it up.

SAGITTARIUSLet it be easy breezy.

CAPRICORN

The frivolity of summer is over.

AQUARIUS

Go out of your way to be friendly.

PISCES

You are a valued friend.

ARIES

One word: edit.

TAURUS

Don’t confuse selfishness for martyrdom.

GEMINI

Make a list.

CANCER

Clean and organize.

LEO

Moodiness makes you seem self-important.