Tag Archives: Neil Patrick Harris

read. saw. splurged

NOT THAT KIND OF GIRLObviously, I bought Lena Dunham’s book Not That Kind of Girl because I’m a voracious consumer of all of Dunham’s creative output.  It doesn’t disappoint.  Girls fans will enjoy retreading source material in what I guess you would call her first book of essays.  What I like most is her intelligent use of rarely used four letter words – example “ford the river.”GONE GIRLI sat through a matinee of Gone Girl with the AARP set today.  In case you haven’t heard, there’s Affleck and NPH peen involved.  It’s a totally serviceable adaptation; true to the novel and stylish, but the movie lacks the urgency I felt while reading the book.  At well over 2 dragging-ass hours, the movie could have benefited from an little edit to accelerate the overall pacing.  In reflecting back, the best part of the cinema experience was listening to the grayhairs chuckle at the preceding Fifty Shades of Grey trailer.LIPSHTICKDid you hear that Wendy Williams is doing another couple shows at the Venetian for their Lipshtick series?  With the exception of the Veggie House, I don’t love Las Vegas, but I do love Wendy Williams.  Snag a ticket and I’ll meet you there.  We’ll make it cute.WENDY WILLIAMS LIPSHTICK

 

I Can’t Hear You Bitch

What’s with the quiet talkers?  Am I just listening to my music too loud, or are bitches basically whispering?  There’s a mediocre vegetarian restaurant nearby staffed by limp, greasy hipsters.  The tribe Deschanel waitresses speak in such hushed and dulcet tones you’d think they were confessing they’ve contracted the latest hipster herp and not taking a routine drink order in a packed restaurant.  I’m not fan of loud talkers.  I will actually urge my companions to keep it down in public if they get overly amped, but I also think this whispering trend is just another way of lessening oneself.  Would it kill a bitch to speak clearly and directly? Besides, making me respond “what?” to everything you say is tedious for us both.  Own your power and speak up bitch.  Dampening yourself to seem cool is pathetic and antiquated. 

Demeter Clarc Manners Moment: put the phucking phone down

Folks have been seriously out of control with the cell phones for awhile now.  Chatting in the car, texting on the train, checking voicemail at lunch, the electronic leash has almost completely choked out authentic face to face communication.  Let’s agree the phone should never sit on the table or on your lap during a meal.  Who are you?  Doogie Fucking Howser, M.D.?  You must receive every communication instantaneously?Why not honor the person who is actually in front of you by turning the phone off?  Less accessibility = more mystery, so rethink the compulsive availability and occasionally please put the fucking phone down.