I’m taking this new approach to relationships where I wait at least a month before fucking. Exercising self-restraint can be difficult, but it’s not impossible. Within a month, most people reveal themselves. By removing the influence of sex on the early days of a relationship, I can clearly evaluate whether the partnership has legs before my whole heart, soul, and body get tied up in the decision. I’m not saying I don’t get down to some extent. The probationary period is a good time to get a bright light look at his junk to make sure there aren’t any areas of concern. Enjoy a good retro makeout sesh. Take this time to find out if he’s got any bratty kids, psycho exs, or a shitty credit score. Use this month to weed out the pigs, weirdos, assholes, morons, and cheapskates. This is not some purity ring propaganda. It’s about particularity not prudishness. I’m a feminist, so do what you will with your vagina, but also think back on your checkered sexual past; when have you regretted NOT having sex with someone? Exactly.
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