Tag Archives: The Face

3 for Friday

LUO AND NAOMIIs there anyone on Earth more sublime than Naomi CampbellLuo Zilin, who you surely remember from Naomi’s Top Model knock-off The Face, learned the hard way this week that you do not fuck with Miss Campbell.  After Luo was caught frolicking in Ibiza with Campbell’s ex Vlad Doronin, Naomi blacklisted that ungrateful bitch from the fashion world.  I wish Naomi Campbell offered an apprenticeship in bitchery.  I too would like to learn how to shank bitches at such an elite and international level.  LUO AND VLADGIRL CODE

Seen Girl CodeMTV has finally rolled out something worth watching.  Even though Girl Code is paced for the attention span of the modern twelve year old, many of the insights and practical advice transcend age.  The show is light, funny, occasionally informative, and provides an important platform for young female comics.  Jessimae Peluso will be a star.  JESSIMAE PELUSOVICKI AND GRETCHEN BAD WORKWatching the RHOC has become an exercise in the grotesque.  Need we even discuss Vicki’s face?  I guess I do.  Instead of the chin implant she should have had her double chin removed and her neck tightened.  Gretchen totally fucked up her once lovely face with those lip injections.  This show would be so much more interesting if Bravo dropped all these mutilated bitches and just focused on Lydia’s awesome fairy-dusting stoner mom Judy.JUDY DOOBIE

The Face

Please tell me you are watching the fucking splendor that is The FaceThe Face is Naomi Campbell’s new modeling show competition and personal fuck you to Tyra Banks, Nigel Barker included.  In a word, the show is sublime.  Naomi reigns over the panel in her royal cuntiness.  A well-past-her-prime Karolina Kurkova has the sense to steer clear of Mizz Campbell’s side eye, but naive Coco Rocha hasn’t proved so wise.  Naomi might shank the Jehovah’s Witness, and I simply can’t miss that.  Plus, when Coco Rocha actually speaks she might be one of the scariest looking humans I’ve ever seen.  It’s truly troubling.  (Her wedding video is worth a view though).  Don’t expect any actual modeling talent on this show – the girls are pretty much universally beat.  Watching The Face is all about basking in the glow of that iconic Campbell bitchery.