Tag Archives: truth

who’s afraid of feedback?

THURSTON MOOREI admire people who can take feedback with grace.  ‘Bout the only feedback I can tolerate is on a Sonic Youth record.  Recently I completed leadership of a program. I wanted to know what my students really thought, so I gave them free rein on providing me feedback.  I said “take out a blank piece of paper and write anything you think I should know about my performance or the program.”  I left the room.  I had one student collect all the reviews and put them in an envelope.FEEDBACK

I stared at that envelope for a week before I had the courage to open it.  I was sure that because I was hard on them – would you have pegged me as a pusher? – that they would be equally hard on me.  In all fairness, I should be willing to eat the the brutal honesty I so often serve others.WAY HARSHTurns out I worried for nothing.  The reviews are overwhelmingly positive.  99% of the students understand why I pushed.  I’ve learned to accept that I always provoke an angry 1% in any room I enter.  That’s just part of my charm.  Can’t win ’em all.RUM AND COKE

Demeter Clarc Manners Moment: Quit Lying

Ever sit across from someone and know without a doubt he or she is lying?  Do you “innocently fib” all the time and delude yourself into believing you got away with it?Newsflash: you aren’t successfully deceiving.  Everyone thinks they can lie.  In actuality, the recipient of the untruth is either too polite or too indifferent to mention your obvious dishonesty.  A white lie indicates much about the teller.  It signals the liar basically believes the exact opposite of the spouted bullshit.  Exaggerations get thrown into the conversation to distract from palpable insecurities.  Lying is not only rude, it’s downright cowardly.  Kindly and courageously speak the truth or say nothing it all.